Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Each of us has a different way of not only expressing our love for others, but feeling loved in return. Gary Chapman, a prestigious marriage counselor and writer of the best-selling book, The 5 Love Languages, believes that there are five categories of love. These consist of words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. A list of each of these can be found at the link below, but the language I would like to concentrate on is physical touch:

"This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive."

To find out your love language, take the quiz:


Most people have more than one love language, usually one being more dominant. No matter what it may be, each of us has the need to feel wanted. When that love is nonexistent in our lives, we find substitutes to fulfill our need, according to studies done by Rosenfeld and Civikly.

One thing I have found interesting is pets as a substitute for comfort. Abused and at-risk children find their need to feel loved with animal therapy. By learning how to treat animals right, children can break away from the chain of abuse and learn how to touch and love the accepted way. On the other hand, when animals are abused, people are at risk. For more statistics on this study, you can follow this link:

6 comments:

  1. Great quiz! I have taken this multiple times and always end up with physical touch as my dominate love language. It is true that we all want to feel loved and needed and touch is a great portrayal of that! I like what you added about the importance of pets for those who desire to love something or someone and need the reassurance that they are loved in return. Good post!

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  2. This was great! I really enjoyed reading this book and I totally agree with his perceptions on Physical Touch. One thing I think is important to remember is that even though everyone definitely has a prominent love language, everyone has at least 1 or 2 other of the languages that is important to them as well. No one of these languages can fill someone completely so it's great to have all of them defined! :)

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  3. Great post Erin! I took the quiz a few years ago and have been meaning to take it since, I'm split between 2. I love learning about different people's love languages to know how to love and serve them, I really enjoyed reading this!

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  4. Erin, Great post! I have been really wanting to read his book, this only further encourages me to go buy it! I took the quiz and I must say I am most a quality of time language. I love how you made your post more interactive! :)

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  5. This is an interesting post I enjoyed your interpretation of the 5 love languages and your reference to the book! By you including the quz I think it added another dimension to your blog! Great JOB!!!

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  6. Great topic Erin! I have found that I have love languages that I receive that are more predominant, but I show love and encourage others in ones that are not my main ones! Also I thought the part of the chapter where we substitute animals, bottles and cigarettes for touch was interesting too! Great blog!

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